No way. I hereby repurpose this product for my own financial gain. Please belt it directly to the driver's seat.
OUR MAGAZINE ADD:
Are you short? A runt? A punk? Do you have a freakishly small bum?
Tired of being stuck in your high-chair whilst your chums briskly circle the track around you?
Your time is finally nigh you pathetic little wisp of a man.
Yes, we are introducing what only YEARS of testing (on babies) could have perfected,
The Sports Poop Seat.
Now you too need not let a complete lack of talent, coordination, and bowel control stand in your way.
Equipped with only this safety seat & a functoning airbag you too technically qaulify to risk life & limb,
And probably will do humanity (those who live on without you) a big favor.
Don't forget to fill your seat time & again with brown terror each time you see your life flash before your eyes.
Think of your magnificent garden this spring!
Remember the motivational motto of the "Sports Poop Seat" sales team... "Just bring our money."

P.S. Don't forget "Sports Poop Seat's" newest product, the "Rollickin' Rollbar." Other, more experienced companies may tell you that your roll-bar can't, or even shouldn't be made of a particular product. We at "Rollickin' Rollbar", proud maker of "Sports Poop Seats", think our six minutes in the industry count for something, and are willing to put your lives on the line. If it can be welded, or even taped together using only 3M duct tape, we at "Rollickin' Rollbar" are ready to make your dream a reality. Call us, while you still can.
Strive for perfection in everything. (given time)
Take the best that exists & make it better. (given inclination)
If it doesn't exist, create it. (God did)
Ignore what I say. (good advice)